Homely Spinster

I was hanging out with a friend today and he was talking about his family, people I've never met and knew nothing about.  He'd mentioned that his brother was married and lived with his wife, Cande (not short for Candice) and her daughter, Kat (not short for Katherine).  They also lived with his wife's mother and sister.  The writer in my quickly assessed the scenario (including the fact that they live in the south) and blurted out, "...the pole-dancing college student?" (as I imagined the sister to be).   He responded, "Homely spinster."

I was suddenly struck by the idea that anyone who has ever met me can probably sum up the entirety of my life in a short, hopefully witty, accurate and complimentary, sentence.  

I admit it, I went through a Rolodex of names in my head and summed them up in a sentence or two:

"Talentless, wannabe actress."

"Pretentious, ego maniacal chef."

"Republican nut job."

"Drunk."

I'm fully aware that none of these descriptions is all-encompassing (they may not even be accurate), but each one is evocative of a person, or, at least a type of person.  But I have to remember always that no one is that simple, no one can be encapsulated in a sentence.  Well, maybe some people can, but never a fictional character, because when a character is that simple, then they're never interesting or worth caring about.  And who the fuck wants to read about them?